Credit: @notreallyjcm/Instagram
Woman In ‘Vee Relationship’ Answers The Question That Everyone Always Asks
Jennifer Martin, 36, has answered the one question everyone always asks about her unique ‘vee relationship.’
“I don’t know if I can do monogamy for the rest of my life,” Jennifer said to her husband Daniel.
“I don’t want to cheat on you.”
Now 36, Jennifer is in what’s known as a ‘vee relationship’ – but insists she’s not in a ‘throuple.’
And there’s one question she’s constantly asked about her unconventional setup.
For context, Jennifer and Daniel married young, when they were just 20 years old.
And by 25, the couple were raising two children together.
Both grew up in conservative Christian families, and so Jennifer was Daniel’s first ever partner.
But in 2015, just two years after their children were born, Jennifer began to question whether life with just Daniel was going to be enough for her.
“I was always kind of flirty,” she said.
“Always sort of falling in love – not just crushes, but really falling in love with other people. And they wouldn’t know.”
Hesitant at first by the idea of non-monogamy, Daniel was concerned that the two were drifting apart.
“I wouldn’t have left Daniel if he had said no,” Jennifer recalled. “I would have tried very hard to be faithful to him for the rest of my life. But I’m not sure I would have been able to do it.”
But in an unexpected twist, it wasn’t Jennifer – but Daniel – who went on the first date.
He was also the first of the two to kiss someone new.
“I think he was curious, you know, he’d never been with anybody else,” she said.
After getting comfortable with the idea of non-monogamy as a couple, Jennifer met Ty in 2018, a single man who was open to joining an existing marriage.
“Slowly but surely, it just became a really serious relationship,” she noted.
“He was at my house all the time.
“It just felt more serious. And we just realized that we didn’t really ever want to break up.”
In 2020, just before the pandemic, Jennifer felt it was the right time for Ty to officially move into their family home.
“With Ty it worked out that he was always at our house anyway, and that the kids really liked him and thought he was babysitting them,” Jennifer said.
“He was being more actively involved in the parenting which was very natural.”
But before making any big changes, the mom-of-two asked her children an important question.
“When Ty moved in with us, I asked my kids permission.
“I think they were eight and five then.”
And with everyone in the family happy to progress, having a third person in the relationship even meant that they could buy their own home.
But despite the family-of-five being able to live together harmoniously, with ‘no jealousy’ or time-splitting issues, Jennifer’s parents were not happy about the situation.
But they’re not the only ones who have questioned the dynamic.
People always ask the trio what exactly a ‘vee relationship’ is.
Despite Jennifer being in a relationship with both Daniel and Ty, the two men are not romantically involved.
And this is why she doesn’t describe them as a ‘throuple.’
A ‘vee relationship’ is a structure in which one person (the ‘hinge’) is romantically and/or s**ually involved with two other people, but those two people are not involved with each other.
And Jennifer’s mom, in particular, was not comfortable with the setup.
“My mom basically said that my kids were going to be super messed up, and that this was going to mess them up badly.
“She said I should just divorce Daniel because it’s clear that I don’t love him anymore.”
But the 36-year-old wasn’t open to the discussion with her parents.
She added: “It’s between me and Daniel, not me, you, and Daniel.
“And I said a hard line with my parents.
“I was like, ‘If you want to come around your grandchildren, you’re going to have to accept my family as it is.'”
Despite the initial conversation being ‘hard and tough’ to explain to their extended families, Jennifer noted that some years later, her parents now hang a stocking on the mantle for Ty during the holidays.
“Ty comes to our house for Christmas now,” she added.
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