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Couples Therapists Share Red Flags To Look Out For That Signal Relationship Might Be Doomed

There's a list of red flags to look out for in a relationship and a couples therapist has shared them. 
Credit: Alamy

There’s a list of red flags to look out for in a relationship and a couples therapist has shared them. 

Relationships are a complex dance of emotions, connections and compromises. While no partnership is perfect, recognising red flags can be crucial in ensuring a healthy and fulfilling bond.

It’s not always about the glaringly obvious issues – like cheating – there are subtler signals that might indicate trouble on the horizon.

Couples therapists, armed with years of insight, have identified several red flags that could spell doom for a relationship.

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These warning signs were collected from discussions on Reddit, where therapists shared their professional wisdom.

While they might resonate with many, it’s important to remember that every relationship is unique.

One significant red flag is when a partner habitually assigns blame solely to the other person for all the relationship’s problems.

One therapist explained: “Every relationship is a partnership.

“Very rarely have I seen these types of issues in relationships be solely the fault of one person.

“Mistakes occur regardless of gender identity, gender expression, sexual orientation, etc.

“These issues are usually dynamic and complicated in nature.

“They’re generally the result of cognitive, emotional, behavioural, and interpersonal patterns of each partner interacting with each other.”

Another red flag that’s never acceptable is aggressive behaviour.

Woman looking upset.
There are a number of red flags that can doom a relationship, according to couples therapists. Credit: Alamy

A therapist explained: “If one person is saying they want to stop triggering the other person’s aggressive behaviour, that’s a red flag.

“I work with lots of couples where one person is aggressive and wants to take responsibility and change.

“However, if the person who is being targeted is taking responsibility for the aggression, and the aggressive partner isn’t taking responsibility, I will work with the targeted partner on leaving or setting limits.”

Boundaries play a pivotal role in any relationship.

While testing boundaries occasionally is natural, consistently violating them is a major red flag.

“Testing boundaries a little bit is OK, but repeatedly violating boundaries is a big red flag,” the therapist wrote.

“Folks, knowing your boundaries, how to set them, and how to maintain them are so very important to your own personal well-being.

“Beyond that, learn how to respect other people’s boundaries.”

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Providing an example, the therapist added: “If you go to bed at 9pm and wake up to work out at 5am, maintain that.

“A decent person will respect that, but a non-decent person will try to bulldoze through it.

“It might look like, ‘Stay up talking with me, I’m lonely,’ or, ‘It’s romantic to talk all night.'”

Those who disregard such boundaries might attempt to manipulate them with emotional pleas or grand gestures.

Maintaining open communication and mutual respect are key to addressing these red flags.

It’s important to remember that relationships require effort and growth from both parties.

Recognising these warning signs early on can offer a chance to address concerns and work towards a healthier, happier connection.

Each relationship is unique, but understanding these red flags can guide individuals toward making informed decisions about their own well-being and the health of their partnership.

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Written by Cal Gaunt

Cal is a former content editor at IGV who specialised in writing trending and entertainment news. He previously worked as a news reporter at the Lancashire Telegraph and earned an NCTJ in Sports Journalism.